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Red Face One Hundred and Eighteen

Red Face One Hundred and Eighteen
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Haha my sweat looks like I’ve splashed it on today – but I assure you I worked hard to look this amazing. Hahaha!

Do you ever think about what you would tell your 17 year old self, if you knew then, what you know now?

Sometimes when I reflect on what I wanted to be when I grew up, or ideas or dreams I had that I didn’t fulfil… it brings me to tears. (Yep just typing the word ‘tears’ makes them start on cue).

I allowed the thoughts and opinions of others to consume me for decades, to the point where I broke my own ‘dream bubbles’… and away they went… forever.

I wonder if the deep, overpowering desire I had for everyone to like me, but mostly to NOT be disliked, took me away from my dreams?

Is this why I found it so hard to decide what I wanted to do when I finished school? Was I was searching for what others would approve of instead of looking for what actually gave me joy? Yep!

I did that… I chose to stop chasing some of my dreams just to ‘fit in’ or please someone else.

It feels like I was under a curse, but that curse has now been lifted. (So look out! Haha)

It’s not easy blocking out the ‘dream popper’ voices but I became so good at adapting, that if I was criticised about anything, even something good, or even if someone was being sarcastic, my initial thought was to activate and engage ‘fit in mode’.

I literally have tears pouring down my face now as I write this, not because I am sad, but because I now know my own Power.

I would give 17 year old me this: “I am yet to reach my potential, but I am aware that I am better than I think I am. If I simply attempt to be better today than I was yesterday, then I am on the path to my full potential. Don’t ask anyone if they think you can, because they don’t know, only you know. Use negativity as your power instead of letting it cripple you. If someone says you can’t… they are only right if you let them be.”

Thanks for reading this until the end and to all of the amazing people in my life that are helping me create new bubbles: from my entire heart: thank you! Xx

#threehundredandsixtyfiveredfaces

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